Saturday, December 31, 2016

A 2016 Fail Does Not Spell Failure

In January 2016, I made only one resolution: to walk or bike 2016 miles in the year 2016. You can read my pledge here.

I'm not going to mince words, I failed to meet that challenge. I came no where near it. I started off hopeful and determined, mixing up walking with miles on my exercise bike. I actually did quite well until about mid-July, then it all went to crap in a sneaker. In fact, by the end of August I had chalked up about 1200 miles, over half way to my goal.

Um, that was just after when I started becoming obsessed with making plans for retirement. Seems I can't walk and plan my future at the same time. Then there was the election frenzy that devoured both my time and emotions and turned me into a thumb sucking idiot on November 9th. I'm not making excuses, just taking a good look at what happened.

After August, I stopped tracking my progress and only exercised sporadically, but I'm sure I added more miles. Sometime along Thanksgiving I stopped wearing my Fitbit, but according to my Fitbit records until then I added about another 120 miles. So it's a safe guess that I walked or biked somewhere around 1500 miles for the year. Not my goal, but not a total slouch either. Kind of a slouchette.

So here I am, standing up before you all and saying:

LET'S TRY THIS AGAIN, SHALL WE!

Yeah, that's right. I'm not giving up.

My exercise goal for 2017 is to put 2017 miles on this old body of mine, come hell, high water, recession, or nuclear war.

Well, okay, maybe a nuclear war would stop me, but until that happens, I hit the road on January 1st.

Just think of all the miles I can chalk up walking the protest lines when Trump begins his reign of terror!

If you would like to join me and many others in turning this challenge into reality, join the Facebook Group 2017 in 2017.

Tuesday, December 27, 2016

Spoiled Crazy

Something I learned this past weekend:

You don't really understand how spoiled your cat is until you have to explain your pet's idiosyncrasies to your new cleaning lady.

This past weekend I hired a cleaning lady. She's only coming once a month to do the deep cleaning, but it's still a real treat. I walked her through my large one bedroom apartment and explained what I needed and expected. Along the way, I pointed out B's toys, B's paper pile, B's dishes, and explained B's habits and needs, and how after cleaning, said toys and paper pile had to be placed back where she'd found them.

After the woman left, I realized that B came off like a spoiled little diva and I came off as a dotty cat lady.

Guilty on both counts.

I do spoil B. She's 18 years old, has kitty dementia, and is my only fur baby.

But you don't really realize HOW MUCH you spoil your pets until you explain your pet's routine to a non-pet owning person. Trust me on this.  And it didn't occur to me until several hours after the woman left.

I also had to explain that no matter how often she came to clean my apartment, she would never see B because B is deathly afraid of strangers. But not to worry, I told her, B is real, just as the poop in the box is real, the bag of kibble is real, and the kitty bed is real.

And just in case she still thought I was making it all up, I showed her a photo of B.

Yeah, I'm not crazy, not by a long shot.


Sunday, December 25, 2016

Regifting a Blog

I didn't think I could add anything to the Christmas Blog I wrote in 2015, and hope you don't mind my re-gifting these sentiments. There's nothing to update and revise, it's still how I believe Christmas should be celebrated for me personally.

Wishing you and yours a wonderful Christmas 2016.

I thank you for reading my blog and humoring me in my rants and shameful book promotion.

Sue Ann



Tuesday, December 20, 2016

No F**king Apologies

Yesterday I went on a red hot emotional rant on my personal Facebook page, complete with language that would make a sailor proud. Later than night, someone asked me if I had to put money in a "swear jar."

No, I told her. Not in my house.

Nor do I apologize for my salty language.

The funny thing is, in spite of growing up in a house where there was a ton of swearing, I never really got into it until I was in my late thirties. And the older I get, the more I seem to swear. Not all the time, but enough and at specific times. Usually when I'm really upset or angry.

Sometimes when I let a word or two slip around someone who does not know me well, they take in my silver hair, rosy cheeks, doughy body, and big smile, and do a double take. I guess fat old ladies aren't supposed to swear. Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!

Most of my books are extremely mild when it comes to swearing. My Granny Apples novels are almost devoid of anything shocking. The Odelia Grey books only on occasion contain a swear word and then only if it fits the character and situation. There's not even a lot in my Winnie Wilde romances, though there is plenty of steamy sex in those books.

But here's a real shocker to many readers: authors are not their books or their characters.

We are individuals who create those characters. I will admit that there is a bit of each one in us, good and bad, but we are not them.  Since I am a middle-aged, plus size paralegal, I am often asked if I am like Odelia Grey. No, I usually say. Odelia dresses better and swears less. And that's the truth.

So from time to time, you're going to hear me swear. I make no apologies for it, just as I make no apologies for my personal beliefs and leanings. Nor should anyone.

Often other writers tell me that I should be more careful about exposing my true self online, that it will turn away readers. Those writers show nothing or very little of their true personalities in social media. Others of my colleagues let it all hang out, much as I do. It's a personal choice.

However, if you are shocked by my language, or any of my personal commentaries or beliefs, then you should not be following my personal page on Facebook. That's where Sue Ann Jaffarian, the individual, hangs out, for better or for worse. If you need a sanitized version, then you should follow my Author Page or my Fan Club Page. I'm a good girl there.


Tuesday, December 13, 2016

A Little Cheese With Your Whine?

I was about to take a leap of faith. Faith that I'd done my homework and faith in things lining up just right and ahead of schedule.

It's scary.

It's nerve wracking.

It's exhilarating.

This past April I got the notion of buying and traveling in an RV when I retire. At first I expected to do my research and leisurely buy the RV in 2018 or early 2019, closer to when I actually retire.

Then a funny thing happened.

My dream caught fire and became an obsession. I researched types of RVs, even rented one. I visited RV shows and dealers and lurked in Facebook groups until I finally landed on the one I wanted: a Winnebago Travato 59K.  This obsession became so real it started breathing and eating up my time and thoughts almost constantly. I started thinking I should buy the RV NOW. Seriously, I would buy it now and have it ready even though I wasn't retiring for at least 18-24 months.

Yesterday I was hit with a fire hose of cold reality in the form of a financial adviser, who is also a long-time friend. Bottom line, I should not buy my beloved RV now. Or rather I could, but it would not be advisable at this time.

My inner child kicked and screamed and threw a tantrum. But ... but ... but ... I want to, I whined.  I love instant gratification. Who doesn't? I wanted that RV NOW, just as a toddler wants that cookie NOW.

My friend assured me he wasn't saying don't, just don't do it now. He also assured me that my plan of traveling in an RV is perfect for me and definitely doable, but I needed to wait to pull the buying trigger. Then he outlined why based on my finances and other goals, and it all sounded like solid advice.

Whine.

So I slept on it and this morning, well-rested, I could see his point clearly. I didn't like it any better, but I saw what he was seeing in the crystal ball of my future finances. He was seeing way ahead, to a time when I would no longer be working and collecting a nice paycheck. I was only seeing the shiny object in front of my face. Sometimes we need that dose of reality. Sometimes we need to listen to the voices around us. Not to the naysayers, but to those who are seeing the big picture on our behalf.

As I said to a Facebook friend yesterday when I suggested this hold on the purchase might happen: My dream is delayed, not deleted.

And it's not a long wait, but the benefits of waiting will pay off. And it's not like I have nothing to do in that time. Besides my day job, I have books to write and a home to dismantle.

Sometimes dreams are delayed for the right reasons.

But I'm still whining and stomping my foot in frustration.

At least let me have that moment.

Okay, that felt better.

Tuesday, December 06, 2016

Give Me Your Banners!

NEW CONTEST!

We need a new banner for the Sue Ann Jaffarian Fan Club, so all you creative types, put your graphic talents to work.

RULES:

  • Banner must be sized correctly for Facebook banners (see pixel requirements in pic above).
  • Banner must embody what the club is about.
  • Entries must be in a suitable format (JPEG, etc).
  • Send entries to contest@sueannjaffarian.com.
  • Entries must be received by 9 pm Pacific Time, December 21st.
  • Contest is open only to members of the Sue Ann Jaffarian Fan Club. (You know you want to join!)

Once we receive all entries, I will post the top 3 chosen by me in the club for voting by members.

Winner will have their banner posted at top of club AND will get their name in the 12th Odelia Grey book, TOO BIG TO DIE.

NOTE: By entering, winner agrees to release all rights to banner to Sue Ann Jaffarian for publicity use without remuneration or value.

Friday, December 02, 2016

Book Ideas. Yeah, They're Out There!

I'm blogging today over at the Midnight Ink Blog. Talking about book ideas and how to get ya some. Check it out!