Monday, July 11, 2011
I Blame It All On The Pizza!
It started with me going to Sookie Stackhouse (yes, that Sookie Stackhouse) and telling her I needed a place to stay for the night. Instead of letting me into her house (WTH, she lets vampires inside!), she took me to this contraption in the yard that looked like one of those kiddie beds where the bed is up top, reachable by a ladder, and a play area or desk is built in below the bed. You know the kind I mean, a bunk bed with only the top bunk.
Anyway, the bed Sookie showed me was like that, but it was king size instead of a twin. After climbing the wooden ladder, I discovered a large cabinet at the end of the bed. Sookie opened it and this huge, creepy thing that was a mass of blue, slimy tentacles started coming at me. She beat it back, slammed the door to the cabinet shut and told me I’d be safe if I didn’t open the door. Yeah, right. There was no way I was going to sleep in that bed, so I decided to sleep in my car.
In real life, I drive a white Ford Focus sedan, but when I climbed down from the bed, said Focus was being towed away. (And, no, that isn’t a subconscious reference to any outstanding tickets.) That’s when Jason Stackhouse arrived on the scene and offered me this beat up convertible junk heap that billowed exhaust. It was getting late and the back seat was bigger than the one in my car, so why not?
Oddly, there were no vampires, witches, werewolves, werepanthers, shapeshifters or demon babies in my dream. Nor did Eric Northman show up (sigh...), but I did learn a valuable lesson.
Never, ever eat pepperoni and fresh tomato pizza while watching True Blood shortly before going to bed.